Foolish dreamer

Today I finished the Libretto I am writing for my Swedish brother Stefan. We are creating a musical based on my chapters in my memoir ”By Heart” that I wrote with Judith Tannenbaum, and based on the lyrics and music from the two CD's ”Freedom for the prisoners” and ”Words of realness”. Of course Stefan and our director will create other music and flows for the piece. Stefan projects it will take up to three years for the musical to come to stage in Sweden. 

 

My dream, my hope is that I can attend that opening! Oh, I am just a foolish dreamer. I have dreamed I could fly. I have dreamed I could talk to animals. I have dreamed that plants and flowers whisper songs and poems to me. Sometimes I have brought them back through the doors of dreams. I have dreamed I was on stage sharing my work and wonderful things were thrown at me. I have dreamed I live beyond any kind of prisons, beyond hate and revenge. I may be just a foolish dreamer, but I'll keep dreaming beyond walls. I'll love some of you who will never love or forgive me for my past wrong – something that happened decades ago. An event you still chose to see and color your perception of my life. Forgive for your own good, your own balance, your own love and light. Perhaps, when you can forgive yourself, you will forgive me. The foolish dreamer, that will keep on dreaming beyond walls. A dreamer that believes in love as swans do.

Middle May

Today middle of May, winter is back full of thunder and lightening. Heavy storms in the mountains. Heavy rain and wind here in New Folsom, Mt. Represa, California, even some funnel clouds sightings.
I sit in front of the art room and ponder how can I be nicer and not so agitated in my dealings with folks, especially the teaching of my writing groups. I hope I don't become too jaded, too impatient to stay open and to learn and grow because we are all students and teachers... seekers and creators wanting to do better.

(New posts on the Bird Blog)

After Rosanne Cash’s visit

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At night I fly - Images from New Folsom

Michel Wenzer, who has earlier made "Three poems by Spoon Jackson", a short movie with Spoon reading his poetry, that gained publicity and won a documentary movie price has recently completed a full length documentary about Spoon and other prisoners in the Arts in Correction program at New Folsom prison. It's the result of five years work. The title comes from a poem by Spoon. World premiere at Sheffield documentary film festival in June. It will later show on Swedish and Danish National Television. 

New Folsom Graduation

The vice principal asked me to write a poem again this year for graduation ceremony. The theme being “Change“. Graduation day, New Folsom, 2011, like education and art programs everywhere in the USA have been cut in most communities.

For the past six years, I have been asked to read a poem at the graduation ceremony, and each graduation class has gotten smaller each year, going from a river to a drying stream in the desert.  This year only four students received their General Education Development (GED) and one a high school diploma. There were a few certificates of completion in the remaining trade, office services here at New Folsom.

Still the graduation ceremony itself was real, and some prisoners' families were there and showed their appreciation for their loved ones' accomplishments. I enjoyed the realness and joy of the graduates and their families who came to the visiting room for the graduation. It was an honour to read my new poem “Change” I wrote for the ceremony.

Change

Sometimes we must fail

To rise, sink to swim –

Sometimes we must be ugly

To be beautiful

The goslings fell and fell

Their first second and third

Attempt at flying

But they kept getting up

Running and dancing

Backwards and forwards

Lifting and flapping

Higher with each attempt

Sometimes we must lay

Down our pride

Like a sword

And bare our souls and hearts

Sometimes we must anchor

Ourselves in pain

To lift the veils of change

For change can come

Like a twister

Or grow steady like a tree

Sometimes we must fail, we must let go

To grow…and

One never fails when one

dares to change

One never fails when one

dares to fail

© Spoon Jackson 6 april 2011

Reminder

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Rosanne Cash

..more Folsom Blues

Rosanne Cash, almost tripped as she stepped into Folsom Prison Library, escorted by CDC special forces and media. I stood at the door at the back of the library as she passed by.

Ms Cash opened the gathering with how grateful and honored she was to be here, here where her father the late Johnny Cash had performed “Folsom Blues” , some 40 years earlier. She choked with love and realness as she spoke of how honored she was and then she blessed the crowd of prisoners, free staff, guards, media and prison officials with one of her original songs. Then Rosanne asked for us to share and they asked me, a poet to be the first prisoner to perform.

I walked through the crowd to the stage area and introduced myself to Rosanne. I gathered up my nerve and realness and performed “No Beauty in Cellbars” and when I looked back at Rosanne, she had her hand to her heart, she was all choked up, trying to catch her breath, as I began to say; my next poem will be “Beauty in Cellbars”. Rosanne said; “wait, I am still taking in the imagery, beauty and power of the first poem!” I paused a few moments and read “Beauty in Cell Bars”.

Rosanne compared my work, my images to Whitman and Roethke! What an honor to be mentioned in the same breath as such giant poets.

The in House blues band played a couple of tunes and Rosanne held a question and answer period. She closed with a song of her father's.

Spring dew

Spring dew March, the sun coming heavy off winter. Glaring on the once sleeping meadow.

Happy New Year and first days of the spring, Realness People.

It has been raining sweet and steady for the last couple of days, but now the sun light is stirring people’s hearts and nature with spring. A time for fresh beginning, love, life and transformation - the sweet delicious aroma of Mother Earth’s breath. I am excited and full of inspiration and joy for this blessed year. Keep the realness flowing.

My present status

Some folks are concerned that I am hurt or disappointed because I have chosen not to pursue a pardon. California Justice system has never given a pardon to any prisoner - any black man serving a life sentence like I am serving - my research has shown that a pardon would be a moot point to pursue. There are other roads I can travel to secure my physical freedom. There are forces, powers at work inside me and in the world, that are bigger than a mere pardon by any politician, governor or judge sitting in some Eiffel tower surrounded by their illusions of dispensing justice. Their prisons may be worse than mine, because their prisons are internal and hidden by pomp and circumstances. There is still BEAUTY in cell bars.

I am not tripping or loosing any sleep. I am growing and glowing and roaring and writing. I am living and loving in the moment. I am looking for a lioness just to hang out with and share a smile. Living in the moment according to the last page in my book “By Heart”. My heart is full of love. My spirit is full of realness and my soul feel hugged by you all!

Stay Real,

Spoon

About my sentence

Dear Realness People!

HAPPY blessed New Year to you and may your lives prosper with love, peace, growth and realness.

Please forgive me for being so tardy with the monthly letter. I have been pondering things. My life in prison, my girlfriend having decided to move on and I do not blame her. What kind of life is this for a woman to have her man in prison? Prison life and the lack of State family friendly programs takes its toll on the woman.

This I have been pondering – a lonely, long string of thoughts.

I have done my research on pardon/commutation of life sentences in California Justice system and I don't see any way or any light at this time or even ever that California Governor and Board of prison terms, would reduce my sentence.

I guess 34 years is not enough for a corrupt racist juridical penal system in America. I have to let go – let go of the illusion that such an inhuman system could see the real. I have to let go because it has started to affect my heart and spirit, my love and realness. I am not giving up on getting out of this physical prison. I will not let unrealness, hate or revenge capture and entomb my spirit and heart. I'll always have hope, but within that hope, I won't have any expectations.

I long to live in Sweden and France and visit New Zealand and Norway, and even if that never happens that's okay too. I'll let Mother Earth continue to bless me and wrap me in her blanket of air and look upon the same moon as you do. I won't forever be blocked in this body. I'll keep my art, my realness, my pen and love flowing. I'll keep loving and believing in peace.

I don't need their pardon or commutation to be free - to be real.

Again I had started to be a prisoner to your illusion of hate, sexism, racism and classicism and not to what freedom really is.

I just want to give love and share love and be love and all the rest will take care of itself! Mother Earth will bless me with Realness.

Closing Thoughts

Thank you to all Peace G´s and to all who believe in me and realness.

Vi är en klippa!

Stay Real

Spoon Jackson

Months of lockdown

Greetings realness people. May your blessings multiply and bless everyone around you and may your walk be full of joy and forgiveness. Remember you must first forgive and love yourself before you can forgive others. One of the keys to being at peace and promoting peace is forgiveness. I think forgiveness allows you to love yourself and others. It allows you to see realness in promoting peace and growth. It allows your light to shine naturally as suns.

Prison day

Still on lockdown so I am doing a lot of travelling and seeing through my friends and Peace G’s eyes, wisdom and magic. Merging with them in realms of love, growth and realness. I miss my bird friends and fresh air and yet when I close my eyes and go deeper into the sweet darkness, I fly with my geese family over mountains, valleys and forests. I tweet with my black bird, cowbird and sparrow friends. I flutter my wings showing respect and appreciation. I keep my heart, soul and spirit open and as free as the sky. I do miss playing my flute. The day will come again.

Stay real section

Remembering Katrina, New Orleans (the hurricane).

This is America?

The hurricane in New Orleans drenched all people in hopelessness and despair – streets, rooftops and streams fat with death – black bloated bodies clutter the bridges and down the streams no end in sight.

This is America?

Some survivors rush into stores and markets to sustain their lives. The eye witness news high in their choppers reports that the white folks who rushed into the stores were securing provisions while the black folks who rushed into the stores were pillaging and looting.

This is America?

Bart station, Oakland California, six white cops have one young black man pent to the ground like a steer to be branded. One big burly white cop pulls out his gun and shoots the black kid in the head excution style on video tape. He is convicted of only misconduct and given wino time in prison, if any.

White folks rally in support of the burly cop. One white lady speaks out on the news – the cop did nothing wrong and black people made the killing racial.

This is America and its judicial system still inherently racist over 400 years. Ex president Carter speaks on that in sighs at the injustice.

This is America.

A car chase by mestesto cops ends in a drive way. A 16 year old unarmed black kid in an SUV truck surround by unlimited police cars blocking the driveway yet the cops open fire and kill the youngster, that car could have been a weapon they said.

How easy they mistake a bush for a bear. Surely, they know the difference between the sun and the moon – if the 16 year old was white they never would have shot.

This is America.

Writing stuff

No writing classes because of lockdown. Still working on poems and songs and pondering to re-write my play “The sun is shining” and also pondering how to write songs for the musical based on my book “By Heart”. So I hope people are getting copies of “By Heart” and “Longer Ago”. Both books are being promoted by word of mouth and grass roots. So please tell your friends. We will also use poems/songs from our CD’s “Words of Realness and “Freedom for the Prisoners”

Closing thoughts

Blessings and love to you all. You realness Goddesses and people and to all people who knows how to forgive themselves and others and love themselves and others – Thank you for your blessings. You keep my heart and spirit free, flowing and growing and inspired!

Spoon